On happier news: I tried hatching out some eggs I got on ebay for fun. Not a great success with only one chick out of 15 eggs, but it's a cutie. I felt so sorry for it sitting all by itself in the brooder that I sent my son to pick up some companions at the store.
The companions are 3 day old Americana pullets and are VERY laid back. In contrast, Doc (named for Doc Brown from Back to the Future) practically crackles with nervous energy and excitement.
They didn't stay inside for long. Last night I bundled them up and shoved them under Watson who has been broody. I peeked this morning and all are still cozy and safe under their surrogate mum. Success!